“She Should Have Married Both!”

My daughter was staying over with me in London with a couple of friends the other night. They were talking about a TV show called “Bachelorette”. Obviously a young woman starts dating something like 15 men, and in each show somebody is eliminated and in the end she must choose between the final two. By that time of course, after dating and intimacy over a period of time, they all have strong feelings for each other.

My daughter and her friends were talking about a season finale. The girl was apparently deeply in love with both remaining men, and both men came to her to propose. She ended up dissing a man she had made love to, and confessed to being in love with. My daughter and her friends were all “Oh she should have kept Nick, he was much cuter and nicer, or she should have kept both. Yeah, she should have married both!!”

I’ve been browsing the net, and realize most people out there talking about this show seem to agree. They say, she should have kept both guys. And they say it because they saw that she was very much in love with both men, and they with her. I’ve even found women on a muslim web forum who say it!! And they do so intuitively, because of the romance and the love. Of course, they aren’t serious. But subconsciously, they recognize that it is not disgusting when a woman loves two men, is intimate with more than one man. No – it’s all in the packaging!

I know many friends of mine who have said the same about Love Actually, that Keira Knightley should have married both men. Because it’s so romantic….. It’s all in the packaging!Ā It’s amazing really how islam manages to package polygyny as good, caring, moral and allowed while at the same time make polyandry out to be disgusting. And people buy into that, just like they buy into the newest fashion, or for that matter just like they bought into jews being untermensch during WWII.

I had a look at season 11 of The Bachelorette. It was fascinating. The thing that struck me the most is how the men there sound and act exactly like wives in polygamy. All the insecurities, the jealousy, the fighting over who is the favourite, while all the while having to force themselves to accept the situation with a smile, or else they’re out. So fascinating!! And perfect proof that everything muslim scholars try to deceive people into believing about the differences between men and women and our reactions to polygamy is an utter and blatant lie!!

Gee, I had no idea reality TV can be so enlightening!


11 thoughts on ““She Should Have Married Both!”

  1. Salam aleikum

    Thank you sister for posting this. It was a very strong post. I looked at the clips and it was like seeing me and my co and hearing us. I did not know that men could feel the same and do the same. I could not believe it was men I was seeing be exactly like us wives. It opened my eyes. I am thinking mabe I should show my husband and he can maybe relate better to what it must be when he sees a mans perspective. The feelings are the same. I must watch again.

  2. I found the videos highly disturbing. It sounds exactly like what I’ve heard from my mom and the pain is exactly the pain I’ve seen. Its painful to watch.

    But you’re right. Men could just as easily be made to accept polygamy, if the packaging was different and they were made to believe they had to accept it.

  3. I’ve watched a few seasons of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. I clearly remember one season of The Bachelor I followed during the time my husband was in polygyny, and how much one of the women reminded me of #2. The way the Bachelor kept his head buried in the sand about how this woman behaved, how manipulative she was and how this guy kept falling for her games. I pointed out the similarities every week – DVR’ing it so he would watch it with me. He actually kinda got into the show, that is until he had to face the fact that what I was showing him was real. Especially how he was in complete denial about what #2 really was about.

    Truth hurts like a bitch.

  4. Hi

    If I get served a dish of food, I might eat and like it very much. Tasty meat served in great sauce and veggies šŸ™‚ But if somebody told me afterwards that it was a kitten, or a puppy I had eaten I would want to vomit. I would find it so disgusting! I love a good rib eye, but a hindu in India might find that disgusting and offensive. You are right, it’s all about how we are taught to feel about something, not the something in itself. I have friends here in the Netherlands who have taken to eating bugs and worms. Not because the really like it, but because they have extremely strong feelings about the environment and have learned that we must start to find other proteins to eat than meat, if the earth is to survive. And little by little, they are learning to accept eating worms and beetles, because this is so important to them. Now, they say they don’t even think about what it is they’re eating and they are happy about saving the world. I believe it’s the same to cope with polygamy. You eat the worms because you need to save the world, and you simply force yourself not to think about what it is you put in your mouth. And some people were brought up eating worms and find it normal. Or puppies or kittens. To me, eating puppies and beetles is simply disgusting, and I believe instinctively to people like Sots it is too. And deep down, I believe Ana finds it disgusting too. Especially since the husbands are having rib eyes….

  5. Cissi,
    That is a profound observation. I’ve often thought the same thing about the religious justification for polygamy. A comment by Fiona the other day made me reflect on the insane delusions we all use to make our pain livable. And yet we cause our own pain.

    I recommend that you introduce some paragraphing in your writing style. I think it will make your ideas easier to follow, and more people will read what you write.

  6. Cissi, that was spot-on. Well said!

    Being forced to choke down those bugs and puppies with a smile while thanking God…. and chastised for failing to do so. Yes. That’s a good analogy.

  7. I went over to Amazon and read what was available for free in Robin’s book. Uninteresting, and dorky. Reads like a badly written romance novel. She writes like an 8th grader, and has the emotional understanding of a high school student; and we all know how self important people are at that age.

    How does stuff like this get published? I guess because it is online only, and there is little to lose.

  8. It’s self-published, evidenced by a few things – one, her remark about pushing the “publish” button. Two, that she’s stuck doing all the promotion and marketing (a publisher takes on a fair bit of that, and the editing she had to do herself is also the job of an actual publishing house’s editor.) And finally, Three, that “LTG International Publishers” she has listed doesn’t exist. I am in daily contact with literary agents, editors in small press publishers, indies, vanities, the whole bit and no, it doesn’t exist. There’s an LTG International Holdings in NYC, which, as far as I can see, is one of those phony storefront things set up by network marketing/pyramid scheme people – in other words, probably herself or else her BFF Naim, aka Wali dude.

  9. Unchained, when i heard she released/releasing a book thats what i expected about the quality but thought maybe she will learn from her previous failed attempts at e.g. her youtube videos. I too dont understand her obsession with using white women’s images to represent her. It may indicate a deep insecurity or maybe her attempt to hide her identity (she must know by now she isn’t good at that either).

  10. It really is awkward. I believe insecurity and vanity plays a role.

    But I must admit, having skin like chalk and blazing red hair, there have been times I’ve dreamt of looking like Halle Berry …. šŸ˜‰

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