A saalamu alaikum,
I am a second wife. I became married to my husband more then a year ago. He asked me from my father and I agree since he is a good man who is known among people to be upright and just. He is also handsom and I could see myself love him. We knew he is married already and my father asked if the other wife consent and he says yes but not with happiness. But she agreed in writing and I married our husband. The problem begins right away when she calls and calls and screams and ruins our seven days together and I say he should go to her and I give up the last two days and he goes to her. And since she has continued to destroy things. She says to people I don’t take care of my house, that my husband comes to her hungry because I don’t cook and feed him properly. This is all lie. She calls in the night and says she is afraid of thieves and he is to blame if she is killed and she lives in bad neighborhood so many times my husband must go and check on her. She sends me nasty messages on fb and my husband will not punish her as he says she is hurting because of him but what about me? I have never had the chance like her to build my relationship with my husband, she is always there and ruin things for us. Yesterday when my husband came to me for my nights I packed up his pack when he was working and found big stain from iron on his best shirt. I show him when he comes home and say she sent it with burnstain and he says is very bad of me to blame her for my fault. He always side with her.
How can I do islamicaly to make her treat me with respect? How can I make my husband respect our marriage? Please help. I wanted to be a second wife, not a lesser wife.